It's funny what relationships at Faith House do to you.
Last time I was at Faith House I stood outside with Derek as he drunkenly smoked his roll up, we chatted. I liked being on the door when at youth club in Poplar, it was where discussions happened. This felt the same as we talked about what it is to be a minister, a Christian, and '...bl**dy cyclists'! Derek got to know me a little more and I got to know Derek that little more. We shared something of each other.
I saw his lucozade bottle tucked inside his jacket, it is always there, ready. His supposed life line. He caught me looking at the bottle. I laughed, "Derek I love Lucozade..."
"You wouldn't like this Lucozade..." his reply sharp.
"It's a different colour to what I remember, is it new?".
Derek looks up and says "No...!",
"...perhaps I could have a sip",
"NO - you wouldn't like THIS Lucozade..!"
I snigger and he knows I'm pulling his leg, we share laughter. Later that evening Derek tells us all that he was glad when he was 'in here' with us because he wasn't 'out there' with them.
Tonight Derek was cold stone sober, quiet, distant, something was up - but he wouldn't say. As I left I saw the Lucozade bottle tucked inside his jacket. Tonight as I cycled home and thought through the evening, I was both pleased he was sober but also worried that Derek wasn't himself, worried that his Lucozade would be too available.
Relationships are funny at Faith House! People quickly become a big part of your life.