Tuesday, October 04, 2005

"I'm Adolf Hitler..."

"I'm Adolf Hitler..." I sigh. "No... you're not Adolf Hitler, he was white, Austrian and male... you are firstly a Somalian and secondly a woman." I'd been called into the Charity Shop there was an issue!

Her crack crazed eyes look into mine, she smiles and her alcohol drenched breath breaks across me. "I... AM... ADOLF HITLER!"

I look back and say "Did I mention he killed himself in 1945?"

She rips her head scarf off and throws it across the shop "Can you see it now?"

"no"

She ruffles her hair - goose steps around the shop saluting and saying 'Heil Hiter' "can you see it now?"

"urmmmmmmm... no!"

"Well may be you'll recognise this" with this she pulls up her dress and exposes herself!

I have to say at this stage of our inner city ministry there is not much that shocks me anymore. I was stunned. I was shocked. I hadn't been trained for this moment! I also have to say that my eyes remained fully trained upon hers and didn't wander south! But the gasps and shrieks from our charity shop workers left me in no doubt that she wasn't in the shop looking for underwear! ( not even red shield variety... John :o) )

I beat a hasty retreat calling for Kate. With no luck I return to the Charity shop - a little nervous - and managed to coax her out while she sings 'I'm Mr Boombastic' - this time I am careful not to disagree with her.

As she wanders off down the street I think 'you know she probably never remember today but I'll probably never forget it!'

2 comments:

Kathryn said...

Oh glory.......! Words fail, truly...(which might be a first ;-) )

Isaiah6:8 said...

THAT IS RIDICULOUS!

Thank you.

I'm smiling, at you in that situation.

Good night!

-joel