Yeah but no but....

In a time when frustration has grown fierce, we can no longer afford to limit love's expression.

Yesterday I was in a conference where the speaker was telling us how she encourages critical analysis through getting her students to ask 'But...' more often. My mind raced back to the evening before where Roz our youth worker read "AND, AND, AND...A Motivational Story" as part of our reflections before Youth Club. Read the rest and find the citation here (to find it you need to scroll about half the page).

Peeking out from the corner of my desk blotter is a note, slowly yellowing and bent from time. It is a card from my mother, containing only four sentences. In it, she praises my abilities as a writer without qualification.

Each sentence is full with love, offering specific examples of what my pursuit has meant to her and my father. The word "but" never appears on the card, however the word "and" is there almost a half dozen times. Every time I read it -- which is almost every day -- am reminded to ask myself if I am doing the same thing for my daughters. I've asked myself how many times I've "but-ted" them, and me, out of happiness....

....In a time when frustration has grown fierce, we can no longer afford to limit love's expression. If we want to tone down the sound of violence in our society, we're going to have to turn up the volume on noticing, praising, guiding and participating in what is right .... "No more buts!" is a clarion call for joy. It's also a challenge, the opportunity fresh before us every day to put our attention on what is good and promising...

I'm too sure how this will translate cross atlantic!! - I've grown tired of the 'but' orientated church I grew up in. I've grown tired of the hidden agenda motivated by an implicit 'but'. I grown tired of the 'mean's to an end' raision d'tre for church.

"...yep we'll feed you 'but' because we want to see you on Sunday"; "...sure we give you a break in parent and toddlers 'but' only because we channeling you towards an alpha course"; "...of course you can be part of our youth club 'but' only because you are a prime target for our slick finale bible presentations";"...of course I am your friend 'but' only because I've been told to make friends in order to evangelise you."

Putting 'buts' into Grace -I'm not entirely sure how we have got away with it for so long - oh yeah less people attending church in Europe than ever - maybe we've been fooling ourselves that we have gotten away with it!

To be a faithful reflection of the kingdom perhaps it is time for more 'ands' and less 'buts'!